Virtually everyone
splurges once in a while, spending too much on something that they don’t need.
If you’re like most people, this pattern doesn’t represent a financial problem
or even much of an opportunity. You probably cut back on spending naturally for
a few days—or weeks if needed—to offset the splurge and everything falls into
balance. If you have a real problem, an habitual pattern of splurging, however,
you may be dooming your financial future.
First, let’s try a financial diagnosis to determine if you get a
problem. Do not leave credit card debt right now that exceeds all of your
available cash? In other words, if you had to be paid it all off today, could
you do it? If not, you may get a problem. Now, consider whether you have
purchased things in the last 60 days that you haven’t yet used. If there is an
issue or even two, it’s not a big deal. If you can walk around the house and
open closets and cupboards and find jackets you’ve never worn, shoes that have
never been out of the house, kitchen gadgets that have never been in the
dishwasher, tops or skirts that still have tags on them, camping gear that’s
never seen dirt, home decorations that are stuck in closets and have never
actually decorated anything or apps on your phone that you’ve never even used,
you’ve got a problem. Keep reading!
Now, let’s think why you’re buying things you don’t need. (I’m not a
psychologist; I’m someone who loves to spend money.) Buying something is
satisfying a need, perhaps for power or control, which should be coming from
something else in your life. Think about your biggest problems—apart from the
spending. Give particular thought to things that make you like you want to go
shopping. It may be the way your boss makes you feel. Anything that makes you
powerless, anxious, or unappreciated, could be contributing to the problem. If
you can identify the problem, you may be able to determine an alternative to
shopping.
If not having enough money makes you apprehensive when bills
come—and they come often—you could be shopping with your credit cards as a
(futile) way to regain control over your finances. If your boss belittles you
at the office, mocking your contributions, spending may give you a sense of
power that helps compensate. If your spouse or children has been taking you for
granted and you don’t feel appreciated, splurging on yourself may be means to
soothe your hurt feelings.
If you can identify the trigger, the pain point that most drives you
want to shop, you may be able to identify another behavior that would reduce
the impact of the trigger. Just understanding that you shop because your boss
yells at you could help you resist the temptation to shop. Even more
constructively, you could talk to your boss about the problem. If that doesn’t
work, you could even look for a new job. By trying to solve the problem at the
root of your problem, you may be able to take charge of your life again.
It may take some time, but each time you feel the urge to splurge,
asks yourself the question, “why?” When you find the answer, you may need to be
able to solve two problems at once: you may be able change or get away from an
unhealthy situation and enable yourself to quit spending money you don’t have.
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